Tomorrow, tomorrow, I'll love ya tomorrow

Today sucked.

Apparently for the past year I was under the wrong impression about recommended course sequences for students applying to the Business school and have been misadvising, and this one poor, sweet kid is totally suffering now b/c of it. His mom called today to chat about his options (before I was aware I was wrong) so after explaining my rationalizations for him taking the course I suggested I went to my phenomenal boss to ask if I was wrong, and I was which was like a giant punch in the gut. I feel absolutely terrible, my boss is incredibly supportive and calming and helped me to articulate what I will say to him during his appointment on Friday, and explained that it happens to everyone and I can't worry about what was and need to use it to guide me in being more "paranoid" in the future, which you bet your ass I will be. Bah. It was bound to happen, I just never would have picked this poor sweet kid to be the victim, I have many advisees I would much rather pick for this. My sister then also calmed me by saying "it's his 1st semester, at least you didn't tell him he was ready to graduate and wasn't. That happens all the time". Very true sister.

ahhh. Fucking Monday. I suffered through an hour and 20 minute presentation on shit that was completely irrelevant to me as an ACES advisor, then I had 2 ridiculous appointments, one with a student who wants to apply to the acting major (which accepts 12 people from all over the country) and despite me HOUNDING her with emails since the summer has done nothing she needs to in order to be prepared to apply. Like seriously? And another student who is trying to get into Engineering, but yanno pledged his first semester and is failing Chem and Calc, the 2 critical courses. Good life choice asshole. I can't even. So yea, aside from 2 great meetings at the end of the day, 1 with one of my student mentors for the FYE class I teach who I just adore, and another with my UConn Connects student (I serve as her mentor as she is on academic probation) today sucked in ACES world which is pretty rare. I usually love my job, today I hated it and for the first time truly questioned my ability. It was not a good feeling.

Oh and I was confronted with the bitter reality that I am constantly the source of my own anguish when it comes to the dating scene. I have no guts so by the time I tell anyone how I feel (if I ever do) it's too late so I'm forced to just sit back and watch as they live their merry happy lives with girlfriends and I continue to be alone. Today when I was so abruptly confronted with a lovely album of smoochy gooey kick you in the crotch spit on your neck fantastic pictures of someone I've cared for deeply for years, my crush at UConn popped in my office. I'm going to take that as a sign. Tomorrow is a new day. Please let it be a better day.